The 2200-37171-001 by Newfangled Networks comes to us directly from Tau Ceti Center, the very heart of the WorldWeb. Rumor has it that it was transported directly here by the sole survivor of the Time Tombs pilgrimage. We think that last part sounds a bit far fetched, though - who encounters the Shrike and lives to tell about it?
We've run this thing through the transporter array a few times and can confirm that it is in fact New, and not infected with any foreign alien matter. That's what they tell us down in engineering, anyway. We really should check in with those guys to see if they've resolved their Tribble problem.
Unfortunately this item is most certainly *not* capable of warping space-time, so we don't think you'll be using it to travel at superluminal velocities any time soon. We would, however, be happy to tell you what else it can do - just ask!
A man with a pointy hat is here to see us about a ring (it seems urgent) - but we'll be close by if you need any additional help with the Newfangled Networks 2200-37171-001. Feel free to look around!
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