We almost lost our latest shipment of the 2200-11631-001 by Polycom. It was traveling aboard the Nostromo when we lost contact. The fate of the crew is not clear, though we believe parasitic chest-bursting alien creates were involved. Fortunately, our salvage crew was able to retrieve the shipment. They had a brief run-in with some unidentified creatures aboard the ship - but we're sure they're totally fine.
You know what we hate? Crummy cop-out endings. You can't lead with smoke monsters, polar bears, and a tropical island capable of time travel and then end with "oh yeah - it was basically all a dream." What a disappointment! That's why we carefully screen all our inventory to ensure *you* end up with the New product happy-ending you were expecting.
We did have one customer report that the use of this item resulted in the creation of a rune-covered circular portal capable of connecting our world to others. Unfortunately, the "portal" turned out to be nothing more than an oversized inner-tube in the guy's backyard swimming pool. Please feel free to reach out to us with any concerns *you* may have.
We'll be here preparing for our next intergalactic product sourcing expedition if you need us - gotta keep the shelves stocked with lots of Polycom 2200-11631-001. Feel free to browse!
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