You wouldn't believe what we had to go through to get our hands on the 50005301 by Mitel. Let's just say it involved a pair of ambiguously amorous FBI agents, their chain-smoking and conspiratorially corrupt superior, and suspicion of extra terrestrial activity. Just our typical day at the office!
We've run this thing through the transporter array a few times and can confirm that it is in fact New, and not infected with any foreign alien matter. That's what they tell us down in engineering, anyway. We really should check in with those guys to see if they've resolved their Tribble problem.
We did have one customer report that the use of this item resulted in the creation of a rune-covered circular portal capable of connecting our world to others. Unfortunately, the "portal" turned out to be nothing more than an oversized inner-tube in the guy's backyard swimming pool. Please feel free to reach out to us with any concerns *you* may have.
We're off to count our inventory of Mitel 50005301 again. You can never be too accurate! Holler if you need us.
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