You wouldn't believe what we had to go through to get our hands on the 6K-V6563DIR by Digital Watchdog. Let's just say it involved a pair of ambiguously amorous FBI agents, their chain-smoking and conspiratorially corrupt superior, and suspicion of extra terrestrial activity. Just our typical day at the office!
As part of a new initiative we've decided to begin sending our products round-trip to one of the Mars colonies to confirm they can make the journey and return safely in New condition (they can!). We had trouble finding volunteers, though, so we had to convince one of our guys he was actually a secret agent on the run and in grave danger. We're sure he'll be totally OK with that once he figures it out.
While the technology employed by this item is decidedly advanced, we can confirm that it was not covertly designed by the Cylons as a backdoor into our global defense systems. If you have any other grave concerns about this item, please let us know.
Ah, well. That's about enough rambling out of us. Feel free to look around - we're here if you need us (or a Digital Watchdog 6K-V6563DIR)!
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