The Cisco CP-9951-CL-CAM-K9 Charcoal Unified IP Phone with Slimline Handset ain’t your average IP phone. True, it may look like the standard, ordinary IP phone you’d find sitting on your desk at work. That’s what it’s designed to look like. That’s what they want you to think it is. But dig a little deeper and you’ll discover that the Cisco CP-9951-CL-CAM-K9 Charcoal Unified IP Phone serves a greater purpose - and a darker function.
The truth is, the Cisco CP-9951-CL-CAM-K9 Charcoal Unified IP Phone isn’t a telephone. It’s intended to be a powerful weapon, a doomsday device. An appliance that will unleash an entire army of android replicants that look like Natalie Imbruglia upon the world. Yes, Natalie Imbruglia. Perhaps the most prominent singer/songwriter one-hit-wonders from the late ‘90s. She gave the world “Torn”, one of the most requested karaoke songs ever recorded. Now an army of robot soldiers made in her image will tear our world apart.
But...why? Who is the evil mastermind behind such an insidious scheme? Why Natalie Imbruglia? Why not Natalie Portman? Or Natalie Merchant? Or Natalie Cole? Why Natali Imbruglia?!
We wish we knew the answers to these questions. We wish we could tell you what exactly is going on. But to do so would require more than 250 words and would put you in more danger. We’ve already told you too much as it is. We’re hinting at a global conspiracy here, one so massive that it will swallow your soul the more you learn about it - piece by precious piece.
So it’s best to play it safe. Forget we told you about the cyber-clones of Natalie Imbruglia that are rest on standby in secret bunkers located below our feet, waiting to invade the world above. Let’s focus on describing the normal telephony features the Cisco CP-9951-CL-CAM-K9 Charcoal Unified IP Phone provides. It has a 24-bit, 640 x 480 color VGA display. There’s also H.264 video support for 2-way standard definition calling with USB support for the Cisco Unified IP Camera, an Embedded Bluetooth radio and 2 USB ports, and PoE (Power over Ethernet) capability too.
But if you decide to order a Cisco CP-9951-CL-CAM-K9 Charcoal Unified IP Phone, do NOT recite the lyrics to “Torn” backwards three times within fifty feet of it. Take our word for it.
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