We almost lost our latest shipment of the XP0789 by Generic. It was traveling aboard the Nostromo when we lost contact. The fate of the crew is not clear, though we believe parasitic chest-bursting alien creates were involved. Fortunately, our salvage crew was able to retrieve the shipment. They had a brief run-in with some unidentified creatures aboard the ship - but we're sure they're totally fine.
Hey - do you ever feel like big brother is watching you - wherever you go? We kind of think that's how our inventory feels. You know - if it *could* feel. Only new inventory here - anything else "disappears" in the night. Isn't that right Winston?
While the technology employed by this item is decidedly advanced, we can confirm that it was not covertly designed by the Cylons as a backdoor into our global defense systems. If you have any other grave concerns about this item, please let us know.
We'll be back and forth through our Stargate here as you look around. Just make sure to grab us on this side of the universe if you need help with the Generic XP0789, or if you have a question on anything else!
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