You wouldn't believe what we had to go through to get our hands on the 5000 by ACN. Let's just say it involved a pair of ambiguously amorous FBI agents, their chain-smoking and conspiratorially corrupt superior, and suspicion of extra terrestrial activity. Just our typical day at the office!
Hey - do you ever feel like big brother is watching you - wherever you go? We kind of think that's how our inventory feels. You know - if it *could* feel. Only new inventory here - anything else "disappears" in the night. Isn't that right Winston?
We did have one customer report that the use of this item resulted in the creation of a rune-covered circular portal capable of connecting our world to others. Unfortunately, the "portal" turned out to be nothing more than an oversized inner-tube in the guy's backyard swimming pool. Please feel free to reach out to us with any concerns *you* may have.
A man with a pointy hat is here to see us about a ring (it seems urgent) - but we'll be close by if you need any additional help with the ACN 5000. Feel free to look around!
Payment & Security
Your payment information is processed securely. We do not store credit card details nor have access to your credit card information.