The 078005-100-001 by Oster Professional Care comes to us directly from Tau Ceti Center, the very heart of the WorldWeb. Rumor has it that it was transported directly here by the sole survivor of the Time Tombs pilgrimage. We think that last part sounds a bit far fetched, though - who encounters the Shrike and lives to tell about it?
As part of a new initiative we've decided to begin sending our products round-trip to one of the Mars colonies to confirm they can make the journey and return safely in New condition (they can!). We had trouble finding volunteers, though, so we had to convince one of our guys he was actually a secret agent on the run and in grave danger. We're sure he'll be totally OK with that once he figures it out.
We did have one customer report that the use of this item resulted in the creation of a rune-covered circular portal capable of connecting our world to others. Unfortunately, the "portal" turned out to be nothing more than an oversized inner-tube in the guy's backyard swimming pool. Please feel free to reach out to us with any concerns *you* may have.
Our Infinite Improbability Drive is on the fritz again - so we're off to take a look (that thing really wreaks havoc in the warehouse). Give a whistle if you need any additional help with the Oster Professional Care 078005-100-001 - or anything else!
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