The 34394 by Iomega was hard to come by - but we have it! We just narrowly escaped an attempt by the Mangalores to commandeer our ship and steal our cargo. With a little help from Corban, of course - not your typical cab driver, that's for sure!
So we had this crazy dream last night that everything we believed to be real was instead a figment of our imagination promulgated by an advanced race of artificially intelligent robots who were harvesting us for our brain power. Then we woke up on the floor of our warehouse where - thankfully - everything was still very real, shiny, and New. Guess we should have taken the blue pill last night.
While the technology employed by this item is decidedly advanced, we can confirm that it was not covertly designed by the Cylons as a backdoor into our global defense systems. If you have any other grave concerns about this item, please let us know.
If you need us for anything (Iomega 34394 related or otherwise!) we'll be down the hall making sure Jarvis isn't overrun again by an alien uber AI.
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